Here is my response:
I have read your email a few times. First I want to say, stop worrying…the first and foremost thing is to relax, and trust.
It is always the most chaotic, just before a big shift! This means that you are on the verge of a big change, and n order for things ot change, …well, THINGS HAVE TO CHANGE!!!
Start by not judging anything that happens! Just stay in a space of believing that all the change is happening because it is clearing the way for something better. You want a change in your life, and therefore, many areas of your life will shift, and you can take the ride with expectation of “I wonder what will happen next” in a positive and excited way….decide now to shift to this way of seeing, rather than “am actually struggling even worse than before.”…choose to see all things as good.
When you start to stay on your path in trust, trust that the Universe is lining up what you want, lining up something better, then you will begin to be more calm, peaceful and you will be able to see the positive in things…and you will start to see and realize new opportunities, possibilities.
The pickle is, you can’t see the opportunity for you to be, do and have something new, if you are worried about the changes and predicting the worst. You have to step into, and remind yourself to stay in the space of ‘things are getting better all the time, i know this is taking me to something wonderful and new”…
It appears to you that your client leaving is terrible. Yet you understand she left due to her finances, not other reasons. You can;t control others, yet the Universe can bring you anythng, so reframe how you see that to “well, she could not pay me, so now I have an open space for a new client who can pay” and then spend some time seeing that happeneing, opne a spce and inside your mind and heart, invite a new client into your life. See what type of client you want and imagine what it will be like. Then once you have that clear in you, keep the feeling of that new client with you, and choose to be happy, thinking “it will be so great when my new clients shows up”…you can apply this to anything, not just this situation.
Also be open to letting the Universe bring you totally new experiences, perhaps your business is shifting and you will begin to do something new, be open to ALL possibilities, and remember change is what it is all about.
Also don’t “try so hard”, it is often more about relaxing and letting go of trying to make things happen, when you try real hard, you often miss seeing and taking advantage of what is showing up around you, look for what you want and let new ideas filter in to you, be open, not determined.
This is a huge beleif that you need to shift, now “but every time I get happy something happens to get me stirred up and worried again.This is a never ending battle.” IF YOU CONTINUE TO BELEIVE THIS, SAY IT, DISCUSS IT AND DWELL ON THIS, IT WILL STAY TRUE FOR YOU, no matter what else you do. Shift this beleif now, choose a new positive one to replace it.
If you have personal experience of the power of gratitude, stick with it, keep refocusing yourself, even if it is 100 x a day, to something more positive, and when you do your prof journal, add gratitude, even if it is the smallest thing, like “i fed my family today”, or “i loved the smile on my kids face”…make yourself find things to be grateful, even if you have to start to tell a different story…tell yourself that you “have chosen to change our life, and look, all these changes are happening, so now you know your changes are beginning and it will be very interesting and exciting to see what the journey is like and when new things come, fun to get to experience them…” make up the story that you want!
Finally “I know the power that lies dormant inside me and I wish there was a button I could push to turn it on” THIS IS FANTASTIC!! This is a perfect visualization, I use this idea a lot, meditate and see a button where you can actually do this, and begin to create a way for you to do exactly this…see and feel yourself activating the power within you with a touch of a button, when you get the feeling of your power coming up, create a physical movement (like touching 2 fingers together, or putting your hand over your heart) and then use that to trigger that feeling anytime during the day you want to feel more positive and powerful
Keep it up, you are on the way…I beleive in you, choose to do the same!
Love, nan “